Articles

Porn Kings Want a Big Fat Sweaty Green Package

In economics/money, off-beat, Sex, U.S government on January 8, 2009 by Editor Z

porn

TMZ.com reports that Hustler Publisher Larry Flynt and Joe Francis of the “Girls Gone Wild” series will be appealing to Washington D.C for a bailout of the porn industry. That does make sense in some ways, after all the corruption and actions of AIG and the subsequent bailout of them alone is in many ways like a snuff film. They screw the economy and by extension us, Washington discharges reams of money, and they screw us some more until finally they all but kill the economy.

Joe Francis and Larry Flynt claim the economy has made America’s sexual appetite go limp, so they’re going to the one place where sex is always rampant — Congress.

Flynt (the “Hustler” guy) and Francis (the “Girls Gone Wild” dude) are asking the government for a $5 billion bailout, claiming the adult entertainment industry has taken a huge shot to the face because of the downturn — citing the fact that XXX DVD sales are down 22% from a year ago.

“With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind,” Flynt says. “It’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America.”

First of all interesting choice of a porn king using the word limp, was he trying to make a pun or did it just come out that way? Oh my God, I just made one there without even knowing it.

Flynt talks about “rejuvenating the sexual appetite of Americans”. Well Flynt seems to think if they aren’t buying his porn America has become impotent in terms of sexual desire.

Now the reason for the “shrinkage” in the porn industry might not just be our current economic status. After all now a days all someone has to do is google porn or some sex related word, click on images, and they will get a plethora of every kind of sexual act you could imagine, and many others that you never could. You can also go on websites and get porn for free. In fact these days you don’t even have to look up porn, porn finds you with annoying pop-up ads, a flashing cyber Las Vegas with promises of orgies and colorful terms for various sexual acts that often consist of a verb and the name of a famous city. So it may not be the current economic devastation that is bringing about a loss of business in the porn community, but an increasing decentralization of the business and ways that people can get it for free.

Now on the subject of their “package”. When talking about “rejuvenating the sexual appetites of America” their are two things that couldn’t turn me off faster. Actually three: Wilford Brimley naked, Ann Coulter’s neck, and a most likely rotund congressman or congresswoman most likely above the age of 55 talking about porn, porn related matter, and sex toys in congressional floor speeches. Sorry, I don’t know about you but having Sen. Dianne Feinstien (D-CA) or Sam Brownback (R-Kansas) (Brownback now their is a name that just screams of sexual connotations)doesn’t quite do it for me.

All that said, at the end of the day this industry will likely have to be bailed out. I mean if we don’t there could be hookers out on the street. Can you imagine the thought of hookers out on street? Standing on corners asking people for a “hand out”?

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: